Feel the Ache

Just 3 days until Christmas

and disappointment settles in.

Am I pre-grieving?

Do I know deep down

from past years

that gifts, family, and treats

cannot fill my soul?

I want to soak it in,

yet it all falls flat.

The sorrows of life

cannot be fixed by one day.

The hole inside

cannot be filled by things

colored red and green.

I love Christmas for what it is,

but it can't be more than that:

a pointer

a shadow,

a taste.

Christmas brings us hope

but not how we expect.

Not hope of a better tomorrow,

a peaceful gathering,

or a perfect gift.

It brings hope that one day death will die,

because the one who should live forever

took on frail flesh.

The ache I feel at Christmas

reminds me that I was created for more:

More than a holiday,

more than my family,

more than beautiful music

or delicious drinks.

More than twinkle lights

on a dark winter night.

I was made for the Light of the World.

Nothing else,

No one else,

will satisfy my soul.

It's okay if your Christmas feels empty.

It's okay if you can't feel the joy.

Christmas is but a hint;

a taste of the full and lasting joy that is yet to come.

Let yourself feel the ache.

Follow it to the Promised One